What We Love About Game of Thrones That We Shouldn't

We here at Crazy are writers and as such, have this um…problem. It’s like when my friend got a headache then learned on the internet that she was dying of dengue fever, unless the lymphoma got to her first. We writers go to the internet for advice about, you know…writing. The sheer number of “rules” makes us want to stop writing, because we’ll never get it “right.” Yet on every bestseller list sit stories which defy the rule creators.

 

The series of novels, A Song of Ice and Fire (beginning with the fabulous Game of Thrones), sits on a few of those lists. And the New York Times (July 14, 2011) goes so far as to suggest that "it's high time we drove a stake through the heart of J. R. R. Tolkien and The Lord of the Rings." {GASP!} Did GRRM earn that praise by following the rules? Well, some of them certainly. But no matter how hard I try, I can't imagine him surfing for writing advice.

I can imagine some random brave soul—even in the 1970s when he began writing for real—offering up some writing gospel (“Hey, you know what would be better? If you…”).

I can imagine GRRM applying the blank stare.

We read and nearly weep at the pure genius of the 3 interweaving stories. We marvel at the simple magic of the red comet—how the characters each feel a personal connection to it. We’re jealous that we didn’t think of it first. So what do we love about the series that we would think twice about before writing? Which of these “rules” are given the finger by GRRM?

 1.       Don’t kill the main character. Valar Morghulis. Every man must die. And every character can too (and uh, probably will). Even the main one, the best one, the brightest one. This is risky if the rest of your book does not scream to be read. Readers who are plunged into the cycle of grief are likely to plunge your book off a moving bus (sorry, but hitting the [delete] key on an e-book does not provide the same level of satisfaction). Yet, they tolerate it over and over again in this series. At some point, it becomes a game of morbid curiosity: “I hate this. I’m not reading it anymore. Who is going to bite it next?”

2.       Every sentence should work hard. Not every sentence contributes to the plot. Or does it? How do I know until I get to the end then read it again? Answer: I don’t. Say for instance that I get to the end and realize there were whole sections that were disconnected to the outcome. Writing advice says to cut those. Yet, now that I’ve finished, do I even care that those parts didn’t contribute? Maybe I spend an afternoon at the pool pondering the odds that I’ve been tricked. “They MUST have been part of the plot. I’m just not seeing it! What am I missing?” GRRM has won, because I read the book(s), I enjoyed the story and I’m at the pool still thinking about it.

3.       Write satisfying, realistic characters. Non-conformance to gender roles or other stereotypes runs rampant here! See? Even in a period piece, good guys don’t have to be handsome or strong. Girls don’t have to have girly moments. Other stories develop characters that might seem unique and non-conforming, but somewhere in the text, somehow, they eventually meet reader requirements. For instance, an ugly hero is eventually found beautiful by someone. A tomboy girl eventually brushes out her hair and feels feminine. Nope. Doesn’t have to happen, according to GRRM. And we readers like that. Little girls can kill men. And that’s okay.

4.       Don’t make the reader wait too long. If your story is good enough, you can create a cult following who will a) buy anything, and/or b) wait for a very long time for it.

5.       Start with a theme and keep it in mind. One of the more common themes out there is good vs. evil. Try to pick just one in A Song of Ice and Fire. I dare you. Power? Betrayal? Family? Justice and Judgment? Maybe this is like the red comet: for each of us, we “see” the theme we prefer.

I do not stand on the side of anyone who desires to drive a stake through the heart of J. R. R. Tolkien. Nor do I need to scour the internet for the unbreakable rules of writing. I will deal with my problem in my own way: by giving the finger to these rule creators and getting vaccinated for dengue fever. Then I will read more novels that I shouldn’t.

  

Wishbone for Grownups or Three Things about Me

Hi there. I'm Marianne and a member of this blogging team. Here's a little about me.

1. I like lists. I start nearly every day with a to-do list, which is not to say I end the day with all (or any) of the items checked off. But I keep making them anyway. I just like the idea that I actually have control over my days. Mostly I don't, but pretend is good, therefore, let there be lists. (Note: the following is not today's to-do list. I just wish it were.) 
   
2. Along with the rest of this gang, I like books. Like really, really, really a lot. When I'm happy, I read. When I'm sad, I read. When I'm standing in line, I read. And while driving or cleaning, I read through my ears. And so, let there be book talk. In list form. 
   
3. I miss Wishbone. I loved that show. It's one of the few kid shows I'd actually watch with my little ones and not use as a way to sneak in more reading time. Wouldn't it be great to have a Wishbone in real life? At a crossroads? Facing a dilemma? Moral crisis? Never fear! Wishbone is here to provide life advice through the mediums of literature and dogs in drag. And so, let there be Wishbone. And book talk. In list form. 
   See you soon.

Without further introduction ...

Let me start off by saying hi. Hi.

I'm Krissy and I make up 1/6 of the crazy here. I'm a mom by day and a gunslinging, mean-drink-making, dill-pickle-eating, crazy-painting, crime-fighting-ninja from space (who can fly) by night. When I'm not trying, to get two boys under the age of 12 to where they're supposed to be going, I can be found either reading, writing, sewing, painting, crafting or doing laundry. I have a theory that laundry actually doubles at night. You know all those missing socks? I think they're actually recruiters and they go out and find dirty laundry and send it back home. My theory also applies to dishes, dust and muddy boot prints.

What I will contribute to the Crazy, is crafts. Lots of crafts, mostly. There may also be a book rant/review in there too. Those crafts for the most part will be book themed, but they may also be something crazy, like how to make a pocket snake using lint (don't ask). I assure you these crafts will also involve lots and lots of glitter. 

Are you wondering what that picture is of? Did I mention I'm the worse picture taker ever? It's a Star Wars lightsaber pen I crafted from polymer clay. And yes if you follow this blog you will learn how to make one for yourself, along with a multitude of other cool things, including a Potter wand. 

So hello and welcome to the Crazy ...

Highly Adaptable

Hello, I'm Susan. I'll be covering adaptations. While the blog's focus is novels (because we're all authors and we're obsessed) I will not just be talking about works based on novels, but also plays (because you can't talk about adaptations without talking about Shakespeare) and comic books (because they are some of my favorite stories in the universe).

In thinking about how to introduce myself, while also sticking to my chosen subject, I decided the best thing to do would be to let you in on my fantasies. So here is a list of the best literary adaptations that only exist in my mind—so far.

1) The Ocean At The End Of Lane by Neil Gaiman as adapted by Studio Ghibli

It's no secret that I'm a huge Neil Gaiman fan. There have been some excellent adaptations of his previous works and some that never got off the ground. I've liked pretty much all of them, but none, except the Neverwhere BBC Radio play starring James McAvoy, Natalie Dormer, and Benedict Cumberbatch, completely lived up to the books they were based on.

His most recent novel, The Ocean At The End Of The Lane, has already been optioned and is set to be directed by Joe Wright. I like Wright, but when I read it there was only one person I could see as the director Hayao Miyazaki. Miyazaki is the director behind anime classics like My Neighbor Totoro and Spirited Away. The book is told from the perspective of a seven-year-old boy (though it isn't a kid's book and shouldn't become a kid's movie). The nameless narrator, based on Gaiman as a child, inadvertently releases a malevolent being that wrecks havoc on his family. Miyazaki and Studio Ghibli, the animation studio he founded, specializes in original plots that feel both totally fresh and like ancient legend. And usually feature a child at the center. I couldn't help visualizing everything, from the enormous creature made of saggy, billowing canvas, to the reality devouring birds of prey, to the trio of archetypical witches, as drawn by Miyazaki.

2) Goblin Secrets by William Alexander as adapted by the Jim Henson Company.

Goblin Secrets is the story of a city where acting and plays are forbidden. And of a boy who falls in with a renegade band of traveling players, who happen to be goblins.

I have loved the Jim Henson company for as long as I can remember. While the Muppets have had a recent resurgence under the Disney umbrella, the Henson company has been flying under the radar. They've been focusing on educational programming. Which is great and in line with their history. But there's an aspect of the company's legacy that has fallen by the wayside, the creation of completely realized fantasy worlds, such as the Dark Crystal, Labyrinth, and the Storyteller series. It's been a decade since their amazing scifi series Farscape went off the air. It's time  they waded into that pool again.

There is a lot in Goblin Secrets for Henson to sink their teeth into. A crone with mechanical chicken legs, masks that come to life, and the goblins themselves. Maybe if I wish hard enough it'll happen.

3) Anything by Daniel Pinkwater as adapted by Spike Jonze.

Daniel Pinkwater is a bit hard for me to describe. He's a children's author from Chicago (my home town). Reading Pinkwater has always felt like stepping into the mind of someone not from this reality, but from somewhere sort of similar. His settings are very grounded and real, but the characters and the plots are delightfully absurd.

If I had to choose one of his stories to adapt, I'll go with the one that introduced me to him, Lizard Music. In which a kid watching tv late at night stumbles upon a rock band made entirely of lizards. The book follows him trying to find out what they are and where they came from.

Spike Jonze was behind one of my favorite movies ever in Being John Malkovich, as well as a brilliant adaptation of a classic children's book in Where The Wild Things Are. He's the only person I can think of who could capture Pinkwater's skewed worldview. He knows how to create worlds that look like our own, but follow completely alien rules.

Side note: Fat Men From Outer Space would make a fantastic Pixar short.

4) Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell as adapted by Jane Espenson

I read Fangirl earlier this year, and nothing I've read since has stuck with me as much. It's the story of Cath, a college freshman with high social anxiety. She also happens to be a wildly popular fanfic author. She's spent most of her adolescence writing a novel length  slash fic based on the Harry Potter-esque Simon Snow series.

I first became aware of Jane Espenson as a writer on one of my all time favorite tv shows, Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Since then she's written for such varied series as Gilmore Girls, Battlestar Galactica, and Game Of Thrones. I know she'd be equally good at capturing Cath's awkwardness and insecurities, as she would be at bringing the snippets of Simon Snow's fantasy world sprinkled throughout the book to life. I don't know if she's interested in  directing, but she's more than qualified to write the screenplay.

5) Anything by Jonathan Carroll as adapted by Guillermo Del Toro

In some ways, I think of Jonathan Carroll as the adult version of Daniel Pinkwater. They both trade in the surreal hidden in plain sight. And the both should be better known than they are. The big difference is that where Pinkwater's brand of bizarre is hilarious, Carroll's is creepy as Hell!

Guillermo Del Toro has spent the couple of last decade creating beautiful nightmare's. Sleeping In Flame, Carroll's haunting take on Rumpelstiltskin would make an excellent film. Honestly, it's a crime that none of his books have made it to the screen yet.

So there you go, my fantasies lean toward the dark and strange. Good to meet you!

Introduce (verb) - Make someone known by name to another person, especially formally

Hi, I'm Sylvia.  That's normally how I introduce myself, and since each member's first post is to do just that, I'm starting out traditionally. Sometimes when I'm introducing myself, in an informal setting, I'll just say "hey", but today, on my first posting, it's "hi".  I am from the south and when I'm visiting there the drawl comes out and it's, "How ya'll doing?"

So, my fellow co-blogger, Jennifer, introduced her comments style as taking on the female roles.  My postings will begin with a word that will describe my comments and go on from there. By way of introduction, I want you to know that I'm a self-published author of romantic mystery novels and/or mystery romance novels.  Here's what happened...for years I thought my first book, The Agreement, was a rip-roaring mystery novel with a romance subplot, then I met my co-bloggers who sorta kinda made me see the light. Granted, other readers told me that my story had a lot of romance in it and that the last one hundred pages reflected the mystery but I thought...yeah...right. It took a while but now I know that, at least the first book, has more romance in it.  "Hi.  My name is Sylvia, and a brick has to land on my head sometimes for me to see the light."

I look at it the same way I see trying to introduce main characters in a new work of fiction. Sometimes you swoop the reader up from the get-go and bombard them with all the characters names. Other times you set the mood and then sneak a character in the story one at a time...like an Easter egg hunt.  Make the reader search the main characters out.  Me. I'm a swooper. I like to get my characters out there and BAM ...in your face! Not what a lot of people like but it's my way. Every writer has their own way.

Introductions are key... whether it's the face to face kind or it's introducing a character in a story.  My point is find your own style and if it works for you, stick to it and own it.

Hi, I'm Sylvia.  Welcome to our blog.

Now I Get Why Harry Potter is a Boy

     First off, let me introduce myself: I’m the long-winded one.

     This is the first post of a group blog, so I figured I’d jump right in and get to the topic I’ll mostly be posting about. Gender roles. Before you drift off to sleep, let me tie it in to the whimsical fake gossip column tearing up the Internet. Officially over my HP obsession, I can now be objective and voice the opinion I’ve always held: Harry should’ve been a Harriet. That’s why I started my own middle-grade fantasy starring a girl. Seven years later, I just finished this story and I understand why JK Rowling chose to write about a boy. It’s way easier.

     Let me be clear. I write for girls. I could care less if a boy ever picks up a single book of mine. I mean, they might be too busy conquering the world, and I wouldn’t want to get in the way of that. Yet, if they ever have the urge…I’ve gotta say, Donovan Hunt is a pretty good male character.

You're in a movie and see this coming. Run!

     To put this all into context, let me cite a movie I saw years ago when I fancied myself a connoisseur of film. The Comfort of Strangers is a thriller (sort of, I guess) about a truly British couple entrapped by social etiquette into a relationship with another couple who, at first, appear merely eccentric. Trust me, if the main characters in this film had been American, there would be no movie, because they’d’ve have run for the hills the moment Christopher Walken approached (a good practice for whenever Christopher Walken approaches in a film, mind you.) 

     Instead, the couple sits meekly by sipping tea and nodding politely, as the psycho couple tells them about all the deviant things they do. This leads to nothing good. It’s not a film for children, but there is one scene that applies directly to my children’s book. The Natasha Richardson character is telling the Helen Mirren character about a women’s theatre troupe she once belonged to (before it dissipated as a result of some of the women wanting to include men.) Helen Mirren says something along the lines of: “How can you do a play with only women? I mean, what could happen?”  then—later in the convo—adds: “They’d probably be waiting for a man. And then he’d come and something would happen.”

True....but there's more to it.

     At nineteen, my response to this was WTF? Having now written my book, my response is: You’ve hit the nail right on the head, sister!

     A girl character can’t fuel a story by her lonesome, and not because she’s weak. It’s because female readers look for different things than male readers in a story—better things. It’s a strength of our gender, this curiosity about The Other. Plus, I think girls recognize reading as a forbidden fruit, the privilege having been so hard won. So if you write about a girl, be prepared to write about a boy with equal fervor. (Don’t tell me that Hermione is as developed as Harry. She’s not!) And get ready to tackle issues of gender, which is hard to do with entertainment as the goal. (Note: The Comfort of Strangers is one of the least entertaining movies I’ve ever seen. Click at your own discretion, and I'll take you to a HP fan art pic that makes you feel the same sort of ickiness.)

     In Thief’s Cipher, I’ve tried my best with a race bred to be domestic servants (a la The Stepford Wives); a coven of witches that parallels a corporation; a male character who takes on the demons of childhood abuse and a hero role in which he’s been unwillingly cast; not to mention, a lingering prophecy that amounts to an arranged marriage between the two main characters.

     Oh yeah, and by poking fun of gender roles at every opportunity. Sorry, gender roles. You’re toast.

     (Told you I was long-winded.)